Tomorrow. Tomorrow is the day I’m supposed to run my first 50-miler. Tomorrow night I should be the proud owner of a shiny belt buckle.
Instead, I don’t know what will happen. My groin/hip is still fussing at me when I walk, and I haven’t run in two weeks. I have 12 hours on a soft, flat, easy surface, so my plan is to walk/run/crawl for as long as I can. I’m stubborn as hell and want to think positively, but I’m also realistic and bracing myself for a DNF. I’m pretty sure that no one else expects me to finish. And that’s ok, there will be other races.
I had a dream the other night that I actually finished MS50. I woke up proud, but terrified. Somewhere in my dream it hit me—I’m trying to run 50 miles. 5.0. At once. Double a marathon. 20 miles more than my longest run. The fuck am I thinking? Why exactly do I want to do this again?
Since that night, I’ve been obsessively making mental checklists. Clean car? Check. Cut toenails? Check. Shave legs? Check. Borrow headlamp? Check. Run uninjured? Er…
I have moved from casual, “I’ll run the 20k loop and stop and drink beer if I’m hurting,” to “holy shit what do I need to do to prepare?” mode. I’m scrambling (totally unnecessarily, mind you) to gather clothes, drop bag contents, snacks, music, and car buddies. Now I just need to find my cool, and my common sense.
This all may be for naught if I can’t finish, but better to come prepared, right? And I’m still super excited! Nothing beats a day on the trails with friends and the fun-loving ultra community. Here’s to a great weekend, regardless of the outcome!
Any advice for a first 50? Or running a race when you’re not 100%?