• SELF tutu, BS Meter, runners wearing tutus, SELF magazine
    Advertising/Branding,  Running

    Breaking News—Tutus are Uncool

    Stop what you’re doing and gather ’round—this is an important announcement. It is no longer acceptable to wear tutus. I repeat, no tutus. Ever. Or anything else silly or ridiculous or “froufrou” for that matter. This includes running skirts, neon compression socks, superhero capes, ugly hats, colorful shoes, or sparkly outfits. All banned from races and other events where runners congregate. The fashion police held an emergency meeting, not unlike the meeting of the new G7, and decided to crack down on the running community. Enough is enough. Running isn’t supposed to be fun. It’s about winning. The thrill of competition. Beating all your friends and being #1. A tutu…

  • thigh gap, thigh gaps, Photoshop fails, Target thigh gap, Old Navy thigh gap,
    Advertising/Branding,  Ramblings

    The Return Of The Thigh Gap

    Y’all. Thigh gaps are back. And this time they’re in the media. I’ve spewed my hate over thigh gaps already. They’re fucking ridiculous. But I got over it and moved on. Until friends started posting all these news stories on my Facebook wall about thigh gaps-gone-bad. And I got mad all over again. Target caught flak the other week when observant customers found them Photoshopping thigh gaps onto their swimsuit models. The swimsuit model-editing doesn’t surprise me, but the fact that Target was the offender gave me pause. This is Target we’re talking about. The land of cute choreographed commercials and Spot the dog and Zack’s beloved Sparky the reindeer.…

  • Advertising/Branding,  Products,  Running

    GPS Running Watch Throwdown—Garmin v Nike

    What’s the most important accessory to runners, other than their shoes? Their GPS watch. Like posting every workout to Facebook, everyone knows that a run doesn’t count unless it’s been tracked by the little alien runners in the sky riding on the GPS satellites. I’ve used a Garmin Forerunner 405 since 2009 and love the thing like a child. It’s been with me through PRs and death marches, snowy runs and sweat-fests. The hubs has a shiny new NikePlus watch that he loves and refuses to take off, even when not running. Garmins and Nikes seem to be the most popular GPS running watches, so the Sylvans seem to represent…

  • Advertising/Branding,  Products

    Open Mouth, Insert Pants—An Open Letter To Lululemon’s Founder

    I tried to avoid pulling out my pitchfork and torch and running after Lululemon founder Chip Wilson after he said that Lulu’s pants are not for all bodies. I really did. But his asinine comments and lame apology have been irking me, so I’ll go ahead and spew my hatred. Stand back. Chip. You’re an asshole. You created a fashionable athletic clothing brand, and with that a cult of Lemonheads. Congrats. But that doesn’t give you a free pass to say stupid shit without major backlash. Didn’t you learn anything from that dumbass Abercrombie CEO? Keep your mouth shut. If Lululemon were half the inspirational company they claim to be,…

  • Advertising/Branding

    My Former Life As A Teacher

    On Wednesday I went to Tuscaloosa to attend a ribbon-cutting ceremony for the new Tuscaloosa Career and Technology Academy, the high school where I used to teach. “Hold up, you were a teacher?!” you ask. Why yes, yes I was. When I was finishing up my undergraduate degree, I applied for an advertising teacher position at a Tuscaloosa high school. For interview-skill practice only, mind you—I had never considered being a teacher and had zero experience, and I sure as hell didn’t have a teaching degree or certificate. But then I got a job offer. Um, wut? I kick myself for not having started a blog back then like my…

  • Advertising/Branding,  Running

    Advertising and the Boston Marathon

    Looking back at my old Tumblr blog reminded me of how I used to write posts about advertising campaigns that caught my attention, especially if the campaigns were for running or athletic products. It was fun to share my opinions and hear what others thought. So I’m bringing it back to this blog. This ad caught my attention right away when I got the June issue of Runner’s World. The whitespace and small amount of copy drew me in, and I was intrigued when I realized it was an ad by Dick’s Sporting Goods referring to the Boston Marathon bombings. The ad is simple, nothing groundbreaking. The runners aren’t all…